Author: Jheni

I am a Jesus-follower, wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, author, yoga & meditation teacher, reiki practitioner, aerial yoga instructor, dancer, choreographer, musician... to sum it up, I'm a work-in-progress.
Indie Author, Lifestyle, Podcast, Self-Discovery, Self-Publishing, Uncategorized

Step Back, Move Forward

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Up until two weeks ago, I’ve been blogging every week since October 2019 about many topics; from yoga to my Christian faith, from writing a book to the pandemic. I started blogging weekly mainly to see if I can stick to it consistently, because God had put it on my heart to start a podcast. The thought of doing a podcast was intimidating and overwhelming to me. It’s in my nature to dive headfirst into whatever dream I want to pursue without doing the research and putting in the necessary preparation; but as I’ve gotten older and more experienced in completing projects successfully, I have trained myself to put in the time to realistically prepare myself while still dreaming big. I told myself that if I can stick to blogging every week for a whole year, I would launch a podcast. That one year mark came and went.

This year, I decided to launch my podcast about living your best authentic life in Christ, and the launch date was set to May 4th. I was preparing and was making great progress… until I realized that I started to lose sight of the purpose of the podcast. I found myself becoming anxious and stressed out about staying afloat with everything in my life (teaching classes, homeschooling my daughter, dealing with health challenges, leading a small group at church, continuing education for yoga & wellness, etc.). I was constantly multitasking (which can cause mental stress if done too long) and sleeping less. So as the launch date approached, I felt like I was not in the right place emotionally and spiritually to debut my podcast. I listened to the Holy Spirit telling me to wait, and I rescheduled my launch to June 1st. Well, today is June 14th, and I’ve yet to launch my podcast; but this time it was intentional.

A recent blood test showed that I have several health issues that needed to be dealt with right away, which you can read about in my previous blog, “The Body Tells You.” It was at this moment that I realized I needed to take a step back in order to move forward. So with all that said, I’ve decided to step back in blogging weekly for now; instead, I will post a blog in the beginning of every month, starting on July 1st. Until my podcast launches (sometime this summer) my blogs will be mostly about behind-the-scenes of launching a podcast and writing a book (yes, I have decided to write a second book — you can buy my first book here). Once my podcast launches, my blogs will mainly be show notes and other behind the scenes info.

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With Gratitude,

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The Body Tells You (And So Does the Spirit)

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In the past few years, I’ve been struggling with my body image.  I’ve gone up two dress sizes because my midsection seemed to get bigger and bigger with each year since my early 40’s.  Earlier this year, I started a metabolic typing eating plan to increase my protein and decrease my intake of refined carbs and processed foods.  After following the eating plan, I found that I was no longer gaining weight, but I also wasn’t losing weight either.  I was convinced that there was something more going on, so I went to my doctor and got a detailed bloodwork done to check for any irregularities. 

My bloodwork results came back with some answers to why I had been feeling so tired, unmotivated, depressed, and achy along with the weight gain:  My testosterone level showed to be very low, and I tested positive for Candida fungal infection.  My doctor prescribed a couple of anti-fungal medicines as well as half a dozen different supplements, and I began TRT (Testosterone Replacement Therapy).  I’m still in the beginning stage of TRT (and the dose is very low), so I’m not feeling any different yet.

There’s a part of me that’s relieved to get some answers, because for years, I thought I was just being undisciplined or just plain lazy.  I felt validated that my pains, fatigue, depression, etc. were not just something my mind came up with; there really was a medical explanation to my malaise.  There was, however, a part of me that wished I did something about it sooner.  All these years, my body was trying to get my attention to tell me to get myself checked, but I ignored it and chalked it up to getting older and dealing with flare-ups from previous injuries.  How often do we ignore these signs from our bodies?  And how often do we ignore distress calls from our soul and the Holy Spirit?  A biblical example of ignoring the spiritual signs is in Numbers 22:

“Balaam got up in the morning, saddled his donkey and went with the Moabite officials. But God was very angry when he went, and the angel of the Lord stood in the road to oppose him. Balaam was riding on his donkey, and his two servants were with him. When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord standing in the road with a drawn sword in his hand, it turned off the road into a field. Balaam beat it to get it back on the road.
Then the angel of the Lord stood in a narrow path through the vineyards, with walls on both sides. When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord, it pressed close to the wall, crushing Balaam’s foot against it. So he beat the donkey again.
Then the angel of the Lord moved on ahead and stood in a narrow place where there was no room to turn, either to the right or to the left. When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord, it lay down under Balaam, and he was angry and beat it with his staff. Then the Lord opened the donkey’s mouth, and it said to Balaam, “What have I done to you to make you beat me these three times?” Balaam answered the donkey, “You have made a fool of me! If only I had a sword in my hand, I would kill you right now.” The donkey said to Balaam, “Am I not your own donkey, which you have always ridden, to this day? Have I been in the habit of doing this to you?” “No,” he said. Then the Lord opened Balaam’s eyes, and he saw the angel of the Lord standing in the road with his sword drawn. So he bowed low and fell facedown.”
Numbers 22:21-31

Are we like Balaam, where we don’t see the signs that God is sending us? 

I have a gauge or my spiritual health: If I start fearing what people think about me, I know I need to be in God’s presence more.  When I spend more time with him in the Word, meditation and prayer, God reminds me over and again who I am and who’s I am.  When I’m reminded of God’s love for me — and really believe it with all that I am — I find myself caring less about what others think of me. 

It’s important to take care of our physical bodies as well as our spiritual bodies.  God has given us this physical body as a gift, which is a vessel for who we really are; and who we really are is the soul and spirit.  In fact, we must make sure our body, soul and spirit are all ready to meet Jesus face to face.  In 1 Thessalonians 5:23, it reads, “May God Himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and though.  May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.”

May we all stop and listen when the body AND spirit speak to us.

With Gratitude,
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Holding Space for Each Other

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As a Yoga Teacher, I often hear and use terms like, “being centered,” and “feeling the breath.”  These aren’t just meaningless, fluffy phrases; I understand and experience these game-changing phrases; however, the one phrase that stumped me the first time I heard it was “holding space for each other.”  It wasn’t that I didn’t understand the words in this phrase; I just couldn’t fully grasp what holding space looked like.  After many hours of teaching and living my yoga practice, I have a better understanding of what this phrase means (at least to me).

Creating an Imaginary Safehouse.

I’m very visual and imaginative, so I like to picture creating walls around me and the one I’m holding space for.  Sometimes I like to picture a room with four walls, or a room with one circular wall that wraps around.  I imagine the room to be filled with bright white light.  These visualizations helps me to calm my mind and let go of any distractions so that I can be fully present for the other person.

Letting Go of All Judgement.

When we hold space for someone, it’s important to put ourselves in their shoes completely.  In order to hold space for someone else effectively, we must check biases and opinions outside of the imaginary room.  It’s not easy to let go of all judgment, but by practicing this, we will grow in our empathy toward others.

Listen. 

According to Merriam-Webster dictionary, listening is defined as “to hear something with thoughtful attention: give consideration,” whereas hearing is defined as the “process, function, or power of perceiving sound.”  When we give thoughtful attention and consideration to what we’re hearing, it’s called listening.  When we listen — really listen — we don’t formulate opinions, solutions or advice while the other person is talking, which leads me to the next one…

Do Not React Negatively.

I have learned the secret to being a parent that guides their teenager without telling him/her what to do.  Not that I have mastered it, but it is a golden nugget that I try to practice as often as I can with my daughter.  When my daughter shares things with me — whether it be random, light-hearted things or deep, vulnerable things in her heart — I don’t react out of emotions.  Sure, there are times when I want to get upset, but I made a choice to always listen, thank her for being open, and ask, “Is there anything else?” (or a similar phrase that’s appropriate for the occasion.)  With adults, I try to practice the same concept.  The minute we give a negative or an opinionated reaction, we’re no longer holding space for others.

Give Advice or Offer Solutions (Unless They Ask). 

This is another “secret” I learned in holding space for others.  When my daughter opens up to me about a problem or a struggle, I ask her questions that will get her talking more so that she can come to a solution on her own.  After doing this for a while, if she can’t seem to figure out a solution, I ask her if she would like my input.  If she says yes, I give her advice but make sure that she doesn’t feel judged by the words that I use or by the tone of my voice.  If she says no — which rarely happens —  I simply thank her for her honesty and tell her that I’ll be praying for her.  There are times though, when she will tell me she would like my advice even before she starts talking, which makes it much easier to navigate.  With adults, I rarely move into an advisor role unless they specifically ask me for advice or input.

Thank Them for Trusting You. 

Whether a child or adult, everybody likes to be thanked.  When someone is willing to enter our space and take the chance of being vulnerable with us, we should always express our gratitude.  It takes a lot of courage for anybody to open up and share their hearts.  By thanking them, it keeps us humble and it allows them to feel safe to be in the space you’re holding for them… and perhaps, they will hold space for you in the future when you may need it.

One of my favorite passages in the Bible about Jesus holding space for others is when He saved the woman caught in adultery in John 8:1-11.  While everyone wanted to stoned her to death, Jesus held space for her so that she can repent and live a life that God has always intended her to live.  There are so many other examples of Jesus holding space for people, such as children in Matthew 19:13-15 and Zacchaeus the Tax Collector in Luke 19:1-10.

Do to others as you would have them do to you.

Luke 6:31

I pray that we all practice holding space for each other so that we can  increase love and light in this world.

With Gratitude,
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His Name is Henry

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Last week, my family and I traveled to Washington to visit friends and sightsee.  We started our trip in Bellingham, which is about 88 miles north of Seattle.  In addition to reuniting  with friends that we haven’t seen in 16 years, we got to enjoy this beautiful city which is the last major city along the Washington Coast before you reach the Canadian border.  During our stay there, we took nice morning stroll on the South Bay Trail which partly goes above the water.  The first part of the trail is on land, and to my right was the ocean and to my left were trees, bushes, and beautiful birds… and this is where we met Henry.

Bellingham 2

Henry is a middle-aged white man who is sharp-minded, great personality, and respectful.  His smile could absolutely light up a room, and it was clear that he was grateful for life and enjoyed talking about sports with my husband.  Henry is also homeless.   He sat on a bench and had some trading cards (football and baseball) that he was giving away in exchange for any monetary donation.  My family and I spent about 10 minutes talking to him about sports and some other random things.  One of the first things I did was to ask for his name and introduced myself and my family to him.  I made sure I addressed him by his name a few times and looked him in the eye when speaking to him.  I gave him all the cash I had which was only $3 (I generally don’t carry cash), and my husband gave him $20 and took a few of the trading cards.  My daughter didn’t have any cash, so she gave him her unopened snack.  His gratitude and humility was so evident, and I left that encounter feeling blessed to have spent time with him.

We spent the second half of our trip in Downtown Seattle, and my heart felt so heavy seeing so many homeless people living in tents and some just on the street with no shelter.  I know this pandemic really impacted the economy everywhere, but I couldn’t help but to wonder how many of the homeless people might have had a place to go until COVID hit.  On Saturday, we walked down to Pike Place Market, and we saw a church group giving away free food to the homeless.  This made me grateful for the kindness that still exists in the world.  

“Whoever oppresses a poor man insults his Maker, but he who is generous to the needy honors him.”

Proverbs 14:31

How often do we take the time to connect with people?  How often do we think about the needs of others before we think about fulfilling our desires?  Whether it’s someone dealing with homelessness, someone who is hurting, or someone who’s struggling to find a reason to live another day, are we willing to take time to show them the love that was shown to us by others and by God?

Here are a few things that you can do to help make a difference in a person’s life:

  1. Take Time to Ask Questions.
    I have made it a habit to introduce myself and ask for their names when I try to connect with a homeless person.  If they seem receptive, I ask questions about their lives.  They’re used to feeling unseen, so along with giving them money, I want them to feel seen. 
  2. Ask Them What They Need and Want,
    Sometimes we think we know what people need, and in case of the homeless, what they probably will tell you they need are money, food, and shelter.  But they also desire to be respected, cared for and validated.  They want human interaction.  They want hope.  And a lot of them want prayers.  Instead of just meeting their needs, maybe we can take the time to meet their wants too.  Before COVID, I offered handshakes and hugs.  Unfortunately, this is not an option right now, and I hope that one day soon, I will be able to offer them some human contact.
  3. Grow in Empathy by Practicing Empathy
    I wouldn’t consider myself an empathetic person by nature.  As much as I would like to, connection and community is not something that comes natural to me; however, I’ve always admired those with genuine hearts to serve, like my husband.  If there’s a need, he’s always the first one to sign up to serve.  He has taken time off of work to volunteer at food pantries, soup kitchens, and even in a prison ministry.  He imitates the heart of Jesus, and I am constantly inspired by my husband’s empathy.  What I’ve come to realize is that the more I imitated his heart to serve and meet needs, the more I was given the opportunities to know the people behind the needs… and the more I knew the people behind the needs, the more I felt their pain and wanted to do something about it.

As we said our goodbyes to Henry last Thursday, I wanted to do more for him.  I wished for him to have shelter, food, and a job.  I wished for him to fall in love, get married and have a family.  I wanted him to live a life of hope and joy in Christ.  I don’t know how much of a difference I made in his life, but he has made a huge difference in mine.  The last thing he said to us as we parted ways was, “God bless you.”  Because we have been blessed with so much, I pray that we will bless all the Henry’s we cross paths with.

God bless you, Henry.

With Gratitude,
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Dreams and Desires

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I’ve known that I wanted to be a dancer since I was four years old.  Not the traditional Korean fan dancing that was so part of my culture in South Korea.  I wanted to be a one of those professional dancers that would dance behind pop singers.  I had rhythm, but I wasn’t by any means a natural-born dancer.  I took dance classes offered at my kindergarten, and I participated in dance performances in elementary school while I was living in Seoul.  When we moved to the United States (Los Angeles), I started taking ballet at a local dance studio.  I was a decent ballerina, but I was told by the director of the dance studio that I was not built for ballet (meaning, I wasn’t thin enough).  I was discouraged, but my stubborn streak kept me from giving up. 

After two years of ballet, I switched over to jazz dance.  This is also around the time when MTV actually stood for Music Television.  My bestfriend and I watched dance music videos for hours, trying to learn intricate choreographies performed by Michael Jackson, Janet Jackson, and Paula Abdul.  MTV and the T.V. Show Fame shaped my dreams to greater heights.  In high school and college, I took a lot of hip-hop and jazz dance classes at the renowned Millennium Dance Complex  in North Hollywood (formerly Moro Landis Dance Studio of Studio City).  Being surrounded by top choreographers and dancers of Hollywood influenced me to pursue the same life that they were leading: Auditions for gigs, acting classes, more dance classes, manager, agent… the whole nine yards.  By the time I was 19, I  felt like I was living my dreams; but there was still a part of me that felt void of true fulfillment… And that’s when I found Jesus.

When I became a baptized disciple of Christ on 3/15/94, I knew my true purpose in life for the very first time in my life.  My purpose was to share with others the Good News of Jesus and God’s amazing plan through His love, grace and mercy,  Although I still loved dancing, I found myself being led to have a different focus.  Since then, I have had several shifts in my dreams and passions, but none compares to the new dream He put on my heart a few years ago.  In 2019, I wrote my first book titled, “BE STILL: The Power of Biblical Meditation.”  Becoming an author is something I hoped would happen, but my insecurities and fear of being vulnerable stopped me in the past from writing past just a couple of pages.  But the reason I decided and was able to finish writing a book was because one day during my meditative communion with God, He told me that if I did not write the book, I would be disobeying Him.  So, I decided to obey Him and make the completion of my book 100% about obedience and 0% about me.  Ever since the publication of my book, He has been stirring in my heart in such an intense way that I’m driven to do only the things He desires for me to do.  In saying this, I must tell you that I’m no way near perfect at obeying Him and listening to Him all the time, but this is my deepest wish and dream. 

“Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart,”
Psalm 37:4 

So often, we read the above scripture and think, if I delight in Him, He will give me whatever I want.”  Through living the past 27 years walking in the Lord, the Holy Spirit has revealed to me that what this really means is that if I delight in Him (if I’m in love with Him and find joy in everything about Him), my desires will transform into the desires He has for my life.

Everyday, I tell God that I only want to pursue the dreams that are His dreams for me.  This may seem limiting to some people, but for me, I know that I would be settling and selling myself short if I pursued my dreams instead of His because my imagination and dreams are limited by my humanity; His imagination and dreams and totally unlimited!  He dreams for me things that scare me because I sometimes doubt myself.  But I take comfort and confidence in knowing that, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13)

With Gratitude,
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Writing an E-Book

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imageWhen I wrote and published my book, BE STILL: The Power of Biblical Meditation, I felt a huge sense of accomplishment not only because I finally had the courage to write what God put on my heart to write three years prior, but also because writing a book is no easy feat. It’s one thing to write, but to write about the same topic and include quality content in all the pages is something to be celebrated. 

Since then, I’ve been wanting to write another book, but it doesn’t seem to be the right time to do that at this time.  There are a few reasons why I chose to hold off on writing more books: I’m in the middle of doing all the prep work to launch my podcast (6/1/21), teaching virtual yoga and fitness classes (click here to see my teaching schedule), homeschooling my daughter, co-leading a small group at church with my husband, and we’re helping out with the teen ministry at church.  Although I love what I do, I knew I needed to continue expressing myself through written words in the form of a book somehow…  And this is where my decision to write an e-book came about. 

E-books can be as long as the author desires, or they can be as short as just 8 pages (which are called “e-booklets”).  I talk to people about the importance of proper breathing pretty much on a regular basis.  If you spend a week with me, you’ll hear me talk about “the benefits of diaphragmatic breathing” and “activating the parasympathetic nervous system” at least a handful of times.  I heard someone say that whenever he gets asked the same question over and over again, he writes a book about it.  I’m sure I can write a whole book about the importance of breathing, but for now, I’m writing an e-booklet about 12-15 pages long with information, illustrations and instructions.  I’m sure there are many ways to go about writing an e-book start to finish, but I wanted to share the way I go about it with you:

  1. Pick a topic – This seems like a no-brainer, but it’s important to pick one topic to write about because you’d be surprised at how easy it is to go off on tangents and lose sight of the main point you’re trying to make.
  2. Write out all the content on a Word doc (or any word processing programs) before you start editing and formatting.
  3. Once you’re done writing the content, have someone edit the content.  As a writer and editor, I generally edit my own work but still ask a couple colleagues to proof-read my work.  They may find a typo or misplaced punctuation that my eyes might have missed.
  4. Lay-out and Format:  If you have graphic design experience, you can always do this on your own; if you don’t, consider contracting this task to a professional.  You can find some great professionals on Fiverr.com.
  5. Decide on whether you want to offer it as a free product to promote your brand or if you want to publish it for purchase.  The easiest site to publish for purchase is Amazon, through KDP (Kindle Direct Publishing).  If you’re offering it as a free product (like me), you can keep it as simple as creating a pdf file for distribution or create a flipbook using one of the many flipbook sites.

Remember, if you can write a sentence, you can write a paragraph; If you can write a paragraph, you can write a page; And if you could write a page, you can write a book!

Happy Writing!

With Gratitude,
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How to Plan a Simple Retreat

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Last Thursday, my best friend Melina and I went to Fort Worth for an overnight retreat. We had tons of things planned for the 24 hours that we were going to be gone (The Stockyards, Fort Worth Botanic Garden, Sundance Square, and a long walk by the river), but our plans changed because IT WAS RAINING THE ENTIRE TIME! 😭 At first, we were a bit disappointed, but we quickly accepted it and decided to make the best of it… and we both realized that God was giving us exactly what we needed: A retreat to decompress, relax, and spend some quality time with God. It was such a simple trip, but it was a wonderful experience, so I wanted to share it with you.

Here are the steps to planning a simple retreat:

1. Invite at least one friend to join you.

Doing solo trips are okay, but when you plan a trip with others, it helps you to make this an actual event and not just “a thing you did” at one point in your life. I generally like to keep the number of people in even numbers so that no one feels like the third wheel. You can hand-pick the friends you would like to invite, and you can keep the invitation as casual as sending them a text message or if you have an artistic flair, you can create an invitation to give them. A great pandemic-friendly way to send out the invitation is through evite.
Melina and I made plans while we were having lunch, so the invitation was kept very casual for us.

2. Everyone should book their own rooms in the same hotel.

The simplest way to handle lodging for everyone is to have them book their own rooms. Most hotels offer group room block at a discounted rate, and this would be one of the very few coordinating tasks you would have to complete. Having everyone booking their own rooms also keeps it easier for everyone to practice social distance.
Initially, Melina and I were going to stay in the same room, but we decided that in order to stick to the point of our retreat, it would be best for us to stay in separate rooms (more on this in #3 below).

3. Everyone should decide what they’re going to do during their alone time.

This is so important. Let me say that again. THIS IS SO IMPORTANT. Because you and your friends may have different goals for this retreat, it is important to plan what you will do during this time. You can plan to read that book you’ve been trying to finish (which was my case), schedule a massage (most hotels will have recommendations if they don’t have an on-site spa service), sleep, exercise, go for a walk outside… the possibilities are endless!
For me, my plan was to unplug from social media, finish reading a book, exercise, and watch a short movie. If Melina and I shared a room, we would not have gotten anything done other than chatting the entire time. (which we both knew since that’s why we couldn’t study together in college!)

4. Eat all your meals together.

Since most people generally eat three meals a day, this will give you and your friends time to socialize for at least 3 hours each day. I recommend you block out 1-2 hours for each meal so that you can enjoy the times of bonding over delicious foods without feeling rushed. You can set an alarm on your phone or watch to go off 10-15 minutes before the planned time is over so that everyone could wrap up and get back to their personal retreats.
Melina and I had dinner at HG Sply Co. in Fort Worth (check out their menu here), breakfast at the hotel (take advantage of hotels with complimentary breakfast; since I have food restrictions, I brought my own dairy-free yogurt and almond milk to make sure I would have something to eat something for breakfast.), lunch at Jason’s Deli (I had the salad bar as usual), and we stopped to get some boba as dessert after lunch.

5. Plan one group event in the beginning or the end of the trip.

Doing a short group event before or after will allow the flow listed above in steps 1-4 above to not be disrupted. Additionally, if any of your friends can’t arrive on time or have to leave early, they will be able to still enjoy their alone time and the meal times with the rest of the group. To keep it pandemic-friendly, you can always plan an outdoor outing such as an arboretum, a farmer’s market, or even an outdoor yoga or workout session at a park. Since we couldn’t enjoy any of the outdoor activities, we stopped at a bookstore on our way back home. I know that doesn’t sound too exciting, but I can spend a whole day at a bookstore and be happy! 🤓

Lastly, be flexible! If things don’t go as planned (in our case, scattered thunderstorms), don’t stress over the changes and just go with the flow, reminding yourself that it’s going to be an opportunity to make great memories with your friends! 💖

With Gratitude,
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Becoming You

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Ever since I was a kid, I’ve pondered over philosophical questions such as, “What is the meaning of life,” “What is my purpose,” “Who am I,” or “Am I the sum of my experiences?” Okay, so I didn’t ponder that last question until I was going through my initial 200-hour yoga teacher training program… but I have always thought about deeper matters of life (which kind of made me look weird in the eyes of my fellow classmates in preschool). I’ve been on a spiritual journey of Svadhyahya (Sanskrit for “self-study”) on a deeper level ever since I became a Christian in 1994, and I’ve come to realize that the more I learn, the more I realize that I don’t know anything to its deepest level. One of the ways I progress in my journey is through Bible sermons.

Yesterday at church, we had the privilege of hearing a sermon from a guest speaker, Daren Overstreet, who is the Lead Evangelist of Seattle Church or Christ in Washington State. The title of his message was, “Eight Words for 2021” and the eight words were, “For we live by faith, not by sight.” (II Corinthians 5:7). One of the points he made from his sermon — that grabbed my attention — was that, “what you fix your eyes on becomes you.”

My iPhone gives me a report of my phone usage, and yesterday, the breakdown was as follows:

  • Health & Fitness: 3h 9m
  • Social: 1h 28m
  • Productivity & Finance: 54m
  • Information & Reading: 38m
  • Travel: 26m
  • Utilities: 24m
  • Creativity: 15m
  • Shopping & Food: 1m
  • Entertainment: 2s

According to my report, the apps that I spent the most time using was Health & Fitness, and Information & Reading was only 38m; and just 20 minutes of that was reading my Bible. Not that spending time in Health & Fitness apps is wrong, but I really had to ask myself what my eyes are fixed on. What is becoming me?

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses,
let us throw off everything that hinders…”
Hebrews 12:1a

What is hindering you from becoming the Authentic You?

Several years back, my husband and I went to a festival in Grapevine, TX. I wanted to dress up a bit that day, so I decided to wear a pair of heels with my outfit. Everything was going well until we arrived at the event and realized that the nearby parking lots were full. I wasn’t too worried, since I was used to wearing heels for an extended period of time. But what I didn’t count on was the uphill walking we had to do after we parked the car. By the time we were done at the festival, we started heading back to the car… going downhill, with my heels on! I’m not sure if you’ve seen anyone walk downhill with heels on, but it’s not a pretty sight. Halfway into our walk back, I decided to take my shoes off and walk barefoot. So that day, the hinderance to walking comfortably was my choice in footwear. The smarter thing would have been to wear different shoes, but I did the next smart thing and eventually took my shoes off.

So often, we continue to hold onto things that hinder us from being the best version of ourselves even though throwing those hinderances off would lighten our burdens — all because we don’t want to put in the effort to let them go. It could be our attitudes about politics/current events, obsession to be right on social media, critical attitudes toward others… the list goes on and on.

At the end of the day, we all want to love and be loved. We all want to feel connected. We all want to live a life of freedom from addictions, bitterness, arrogance, and tension. So what will you do in order to become the most authentic YOU that you can be?

With Gratitude,
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Bible, Book, Christian, Indie Author, Lifestyle, Self Improvement, Self-Discovery

Behind Procrastination

Featuredby JheniLeave a Comment on Behind Procrastination

I can’t believe it. The first quarter of 2021 is already behind us. As I begin the second quarter of this year, I feel tempted to just coast through it because frankly, I’m tired. I feel like I was on hyper-fast mode from January to March, mainly because of a homeschool co-op that my daughter and I were a part of. When the co-op ended two weeks ago, I felt like running through an aisle dancing and singing! It’s been nice to actually get decent amount of sleep and not grade papers, edit articles (I was teaching a Journalism class to middle school and high school students), and drive almost 2 hours roundtrip weekly. I gave myself a week to relax and recover, but I found myself filling up my schedule, which made the goal of getting replenished a bit challenging. I think deep down inside, I knew all along that the reason why I was staying busy is because I didn’t want to get back to preparing for my podcast launch on May 4th. To put it bluntly, I was procrastinating.

“One of these days, is none of these days.”
– H.G. Bohn

There are so many reasons behind why people procrastinate, such as fear of failure, fear of success, misplaced priorities, or just plain apathy. For me, it’s definitely fear of failure in regards to my podcasting. All the steps necessary to make a good podcast feels overwhelming. It’s not just about recording a segment or interviewing someone. It’s the fact that you’re committing to doing this on a regular basis. It’s also the fact that I have to put in the time to create good content that generates interest. As overwhelming as it is, I’m willing to commit and put in the work because this is all for God. Podcasting — just like writing and publishing a book — is not something that I desire to do for my own glory. I’m perfectly fine just teaching fitness, yoga and meditation classes, but God continues to put big dreams on my heart that I can’t shake off of my soul.

He has a way of giving us dreams that burn in our hearts until we accomplish them for His glory.

So now, I must continue to pray. I must continue to listen to His voice through His Word (The Bible), and messages (from nature, people, anything and everything). Lastly, I must put one foot in front of the other and do the next right thing… all for God’s glory!

And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
Colossians 3:17

I pray that your week is productive and pleasing to God!

With Gratitude,
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Know Thyself

by JheniLeave a Comment on Know Thyself

Have you ever met a person who just seems to have no self-awareness?  Of course, there are the obvious indications of behaviors that lack self-awareness, such as arrogance, obnoxiousness, and hypocrisy; but today, we’re going to look at three subtle forms of lacking self-awareness and how they may apply to anyone (including myself):

1. TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF TOO MUCH

I grew up as a performer.  I’ve been acting, singing, dancing and playing the piano since I was in Kindergarten.  Not that I was ever famous, but I’ve had my share of strangers coming up to me after performances to chat. I remember this one time where two ladies came up to me after I performed a song I wrote for a women’s event.  They were very generous with their compliments and asked me questions about my musical training and some general questions about my life.  I walked away from that conversation feeling great… until that evening.  I thought to myself, “I don’t know anything about those two wonderful ladies that I talked to today.”  I realized that I missed a great opportunity to know about their lives and a chance to learn from them (we can learn something from everyone we meet).  So, now I have a rule that I follow: When people ask me questions about myself (especially people that I meet for the first time), I make it a point to ask them questions as well.  I also make sure that I end my responses within 3 minutes.  Lastly, if I notice that the only voice I’ve been hearing for the past 5 minutes is my own, it’s time to wrap it up and ask others some questions about them.

“Proud fools talk too much…”
Proverbs 14:3a

2. NOT KNOWING THE RIGHT TIME OR THE PLACE

Oh boy.  This sums up my adolescent years.  I used to throw out my opinions to anyone and everyone, whether or not they asked for it.  I once talked about a cute boy at a memorial.  I wanted to hang out with my crush during lunch at school instead of being there for my friend whose dad was hospitalized. (My excuse was that she said she wanted to be alone, even though I knew she didn’t really want to be alone.)  I would bring up an inside joke to my friend, knowing well that the girl standing right by her was already feeling left out.  I was very immature as a young teen.  As I became a young adult (age 19 or 20), I was confronted (in a very loving way) by some great friends about my behavior and how it affected people.  When I stepped back and imagined watching myself acting this way, I was mortified!  I realized that what I did and said — good or bad — had a lasting affect on people.  From that point on, I decided that I was going to err on the side of consideration and not assume that “it’s no big deal.”

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.”
Proverbs 18:21
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control…”
Galatians 5:22-23a

3. ENGAGING IN NEGATIVE SELF-TALK

This one may seem odd to be considered not having self-awareness; but when we engage in negative self-talk, we’re no longer aware of the truth about who we are.

The other day, I was struggling with feeling like I’m worth anybody’s friendship.  Having had  a Birthday recently, I’ve received countless birthday wishes on social media, numerous text messages, a few Birthday voice messages (including an annual birthday song by one of my dear friends, musician Marcus A. Johnson), and even friends who insisted on taking me out to lunch.  As the day approached for my lunch dates with my friends, I started to wonder why they’re friends with me.  I thought to myself, “What do I really bring to the friendship?  They are such loving people who care about everyone. That’s probably why they consider me their friend.”  This thought began a downward spiral, down a rabbit hole of negative self-talk.  About 5 minutes into it (a lot of thoughts can occur in 5 minutes), I took a step back and assessed myself.  I became aware of who I am in Christ once again.  According to John 1:12, I am a child of God.  According to Romans 8:1, I am not condemned (therefore, I should not condemn myself).  According to Ephesians 2:10, I am God’s handiwork, created in Jesus to do good.  And according to1 Thessalonians 1:4, I am loved by God and have been chosen by Him.

Self-awareness isn’t just nurturing to our souls; it’s essential for our spiritual survival.  Without being aware of who we are in Christ, we can not be aware of our true selves as children of God. 

May we all walk in self-awareness on the road to our individual authenticity.

 

With Gratitude,
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